"So I said 'it'll go to penalties' and he said, 'if it goes to penalties I'll give you a guinea fowl', and now he won't give me my guinea fowl cos he says it wasn't a real bet cos I didn't stake anything on it."

Men, honestly.

I got fed up with being harrassed by people wanting to sell me souvenirs and I ran out of money, so I took an infinite number of dodgy buses and came to sponge off my friends for a few days. My father's nuns have not got in touch with me so this may be indefinite. I'm also ill and not feeling like getting buses. And having people to talk to makes the books last longer.

It's fun. They live in a funky little town and have loads of lovely friends, and I have spent rather more time than I'd like watching football (and rugby, but I mind that less) but there is lots of cheap beer and it's all good. Anyway, seeing as I'm supposed to be rejoining the real world in a few weeks (fat chance) I'd better go and ask the BBC what's going on in it.

Hannah